Dear Questioner,
Hey, man, I was going to make this satire, but as I sat over my computer googling hippie slang and Andrew Tate quotes for this response, I figured that you would probably appreciate a genuine response. I know that if I were in your position I would.
Before I answer this, I want to drop a disclaimer. I'm not gonna throw out a bunch of sources with statistics and studies - if that's what you want, go google it for yourself. Now, that being said, what I’m about to tell you doesn't work for everyone or with everyone; I don't even believe myself qualified to give you the best response possible, but I'll do what I can to help.
In my experience, one of the number one things that women look for in men is confidence. Well, not particularly confidence, but a sort of aura - a sense of purpose and self-importance, only not too over the top. Not to the point where you seem egotistical or boastful. Even when you’re in a situation where you’re worried about the ramifications of what you’re gonna say and where you feel like every little detail matters, just be yourself. I know that sounds cliché, but sincerity is a virtue that is often overlooked, and, in my experience, when a woman recognizes sincerity and honesty in a man, she gains a newfound respect for him. Respect is an essential part in not only the first stage of trying to win over a girl but in relationships as well; no functional relationship can exist without mutual respect from all parties.
Now for the hard part. To gain respect from women, you first have to gain respect for yourself. And I’m not gonna give you some of that “you’re already perfect, just accept yourself” BS that you hear a lot these days because I don’t believe that it's true. As human beings, we are constantly changing - whether we like it or not, we gain new information every day and we develop and grow with it. You aren't perfect, you never were perfect, and you never will be perfect. Neither will anyone you know, or anyone on the whole planet. It can be difficult to hear, but it is true. That being said, and this is coming from my philosophy, religion, and experience here, it is our job as humans to strive to become better every waking moment of our lives. To die virtuously—that is, having lived a just, courageous, wise, and compassionate life—is to die fulfilled, and if you are constantly trying to become the best version of yourself, eventually you will be. Furthermore, you will gain self-awareness and respect for yourself that completely changes your perspective on many things, even changing the way you act and view the world around you. In short, just do the things you know you have to do, even when you don’t want to. Finish studying even though you’re tired. Read that book on making money or success. Go to the gym even when you’ve had a long day. Hit that extra hour of sleep even though you’re really into the game you’re playing. You’ll be thankful for it the next day.
By doing these things, you make yourself a man of value, and in turn, you’ll learn what kind of woman you really want. Over time, women will notice these changes in you and be more drawn to you. Who doesn't want a hardworking, intelligent, sincere, strong, kind man? Even if it doesn't work out the way you wanted, by striving to become the greatest version of yourself, by constantly developing and becoming better than you were the previous day, you will experience joys unlike any you have bore witness to.
Lastly, if there’s a particular woman in mind, go for it, man. My wrestling coach said (discussing wrestling tactics of course) that you miss one hundred percent of the shots you don’t take. The same applies here. By not taking initiative, you sacrifice any chance you have of getting what you want. Never be afraid to shoot that shot, not even with the most beautiful girl in the room. You as a human being have more value than you could ever imagine, and consistently increasing that value through what I’ve mentioned above will do nothing but set you on a path of self-discovery and growth. Take care, dude.
Hope this helped,
The Top G of Dear Letterbox
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