Dear reader,
The complicated part about this question is that there is a very thin line between platonic and romantic interest. With platonic love, usually, there isn’t much “attraction.” In my opinion, romantic attraction is where sexual and romantic interest come into the equation. If you’re just interested in someone, it doesn’t necessarily mean you are romantically attracted to them. Maybe you're just sexually attracted to their looks. But, of course, it doesn’t mean that every time there's sexual attraction, there's also romantic attraction; some people can be sexually attracted to someone without knowing them at all.
I also like to think about the different factors, for example: emotional intensity, physical attraction, the intent you have with them, flirting, and different communication styles. With platonic relationships, you don’t usually get jealous in the sense where, in the face of someone getting into a romantic relationship, you think that you should be the one dating them.
If the relationship is platonic, you won’t feel the butterflies all over your body. But if you feel said butterflies, then...I think you know what this means. But butterflies don’t just equal romance. For example, if you’re in a very long-term relationship with someone, you might not feel the same type of feelings toward that person as if you’ve been dating for a few months. But this question is asking about romantic attraction and not about actual love. I think love is a totally different topic that is also a lot more complex, but if you are just talking about infatuated attraction, then I think butterflies are a big indicator.
I don’t think surface-level attraction is a checklist of symptoms that you tick off. For example, you could be sexually attracted to someone but not have butterflies. Or you could have butterflies for someone without necessarily thinking about long-term effects, which can just mean a silly crush. However, I think when you are genuinely romantically interested, all the factors would apply.
Also when you are romantically attracted to someone, it could be different from being in love with someone. If you’re in love with someone, of course, it’s very different for many people. Nevertheless...
Go with your heart and gut feeling, trust yourself. If it is meant to be, it will be. It might not happen right now, since people still have to figure themselves out before they can tell if they are ready for a relationship. But if it doesn’t happen, then don’t worry; you’ll eventually find the right person for you.
Don’t ever go into a relationship looking for one. Entering a relationship specifically to find one is like searching for a rare and delicate flower in a garden of diverse blooms. Instead of fixating on a specific blossom, let the garden of connections flourish naturally, allowing the right one to bloom beside you.
I hope the best for you, and that you find the right person. Always do what you think is the best for yourself!
Sincerely,
Dear Letterbox
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